So earlier today in her journal, cadhla made a statement to the effect of how she even doesn’t pretend to be a dumb blonde, as it doesn’t fit her self-image, and besides which, she said, “The dumb ones die fast.”
And, that got me to thinking. This usually indicates danger.
The Dumb Ones Don’t Live Long
by Rob Wynne
TTTO: “Only The Good Die Young” by Billy Joel
Well, hey there, Blondie, don’t make me search
You think you can run faster than I can lurch
Or that you’ll be safe if you hide in a church
I hate to tell you that you’re wrong
Well, they showed you a house and they said stay away
But you couldn’t wait past the end of the day
Now your brains are the center dish on my buffet
You will not outlive this song
You know the dumb ones, they don’t live long
You might have heard I died and was buried and gone
But I’ve come back and I’m here until dawn
When you see my hand coming up through the lawn
It might be best if you ran along
So come on, now Blondie, leave me a trail
Your attempts to escape are predestined to fail
Sooner or later, I’m bound to prevail
And your flesh will make me strong
You know the dumb ones, they don’t live long
Then you came down the stairs
Mmmmm, In your underwear
Oh, but Blondie you’re a morsel who has just come into season
Your night will just get worse
Once I stop to eat your boyfriend first
Whoa-oh-oh
You might think that the dead would just stay in the ground
But I’ve never been one for just lying around
And you can’t hide long before you are found
You shouldn’t go where you don’t belong
You know the dumb ones, they don’t live long
This isn’t what she meant
But now you’re cornered and your luck is spent
Whoa-oh-oh
Come out come out come out, Blondie don’t make me search
You think you run much faster than I can lurch
Or that you are safe if you hide in a church
I hate to tell you that you’re wrong
You know the dumb ones, they don’t live long
sotto_voce
LOVE it! 🙂
gorgeousgary
Now stop that! Only Jeff and Maya have my permission to ruin my favorite classic rock songs! 😎
Rob Wynne
Have you ever actually looked at the REST of the songs I’ve written? 🙂
gorgeousgary
Yes. Care to guess what I start humming any time I head “Kodachrome” on the radio? 😎
technoshaman
Hadn’t until now, except for Aural Vixation (which had me laughing my butt off first time you posted it)…
“Plains of Nebraska” made me think. Thanks.
dan_ad_nauseam
You don’t want to deal with then
scs_11
That’s . . . that’s . . . that’s . . .
That’s so true.
cadhla
…I love you, darlin’.
osewalrus
Blondie?
TTO: The Stranger
She is blond, she is hot
She is out where no girl should be
You have risen you are hunting
You are looking for fresh meat
So you stalk and taunt your prey
And the panicked little blondie
Tries to run away in terror
So you play with her and follow
Rushing eager for the treat
Oh the hunt is such a thrill
Yet some nagging sense of danger
Like some disregarded warning
Seems to echo in your ear
Now the girl’s no longer running
And things keep on getting stranger
As the blond girl turns and smiles
And the Slayer stands revealed
You try to scare her once again
But she only laughs, and strikes swift as the wind
Now it’s you that tries to run away
To flee the hunter’s laugh, to live another day
You may never understand
How this Slayer is inspired
She is not afraid or stupid
And you’ll find she’s very strong
As her stake goes through your rib cage
You disolve like ash in fire
As yet one more vamp expires
When the Slayer comes along!
fabricdragon
Re: Blondie?
oh… cool! you should post this one to the filk group as well.
osewalrus
Re: Blondie?
Where would that be?
kayshapero
Snerk!
fmullen7
Classic. Just love it!
eloren
*claps merrily* Bravo! Encore Encore!
filkferengi
Fun! Will we be hearing this at the April housefilk?