Tag: creative Page 15 of 17

Jeff’s Wedding
by Robert Wynne
Music: “Get Me To The Church On Time” from the musical My Fair Lady
© 1999

I’m getting married in the morning
To hell with writing stories down
Ive got no time
for prose, verse, or rhyme
I’ve got to catch my plane on time

I’m getting married out in Houston
Strange, but it wasn’t my idea
Don’t try to stop me
She’ll always top me
Just get me to my plane on time

If I am typing, turn off the power
If I am sleeping, remind me of the hour

Cause I’m getting married, no escaping
No turning back now, thats for sure
No time to re-think
Pour me a stiff drink
And get me to my plane
(Don’t mind if I complain)
Just get….me…to…my….plane
….
on
…
time
Jeff Williams is my writing partner, my best friend since Jr. High School, and the brother I never had. I was unfortunately unable to attend his wedding, but the night before he left for Texas, I did write this song for him. My biggest regret was being unable to perform it at his reception.

Georgia’s First Ever Filking Con

In Songs

Georgia’s First Ever Filking Con
by Robert Wynne
Music: “Bad Bad Leroy Brown” by Jim Croce
© 1999

On the south side of Atlanta
Came a different sort of fun
You know we’d never seen
Something quite so keen
As a real live filking con[1]

There was no masquarade or art show
Michael[2] sold tapes from his room
All day we gathered round
And made a joyous sound
In the Ramada’s main ballroom

It’s Georgia’s First Ever Filking Con
Three southern nights of joy and song
And no one ever had so much fun
As the con called GaFilk One

Juanita Coulson[3] was delightful
But then, when’s that a surprise?
How does she not go hor-us
Growling out each chorus
With that twinkle in her eye?

Mike and Anne came[4] ‘cross the water
With British filk they did entice
The Great White North was on board
With a Canadian Horde[5]
And boy did they sound nice!

At Georgia’s First Ever Filking Con
Three southern nights of joy and song
And no one ever had so much fun
As the con called GaFilk One

Well the weekend went too swiftly
Much too soon we reached the end
When Brenda[6] took the floor
To sing “Strangers No More”
Every single one joined in!

Bill[7] declared the con was over
But we all let out a cheer
When he took up the call
And told one and all
“We’ll be right back here next year

At Georgia’s Second Ever Filking Con
Three more nights of Joy and Song
So no matter what else you do
Make sure that you’re at GaFilk Two!”

[1] This was the first filk con ever held in Georgia
[2] Michael Liebmann got “the whole store” from Random Factors and was the only (and much put upon) dealer
[3] You don’t need me to introduce this lady, do you? 🙂
[4] Mike and Anne Whittaker (of the filk band Phoenix)
[5] Glenn Simser (the Interfilk guest) and Dave and Judith Hayman were down
[6] Brenda Sutton. “Strangers No More” is the official song of GaFiA, the Georgia Filking Association.
[7] Bill Sutton was the con chairman

I wrote this after arriving home after the first Georgia Filk Con, when everything was still fresh in my head. I had a great time, and five years later, Gafilk is still going strong. Being a part of the Gafilk concom has been a wonderful experience for me the last four years, and I’m looking forward to many more.

Update (August, 2018): Holy cow, we’re prepping to put on Gafilk 21 in January…

Dungeonville

In Songs

Dungeonville
by Robert Wynne
Music: “Margaritaville” by Jimmy Buffett
© 1999

Down in the cavern
Far from the tavern
Cold and lonely down here in the dark
Monsters all around
Making some weird sounds
Now I know this is no walk in the park

Hiding away again down here in Dungeonville
Hoping my luck doesn’t turn for the worse
Some people claim that there’s a fortune to gain
But I know, I’ve got to find it first

The monsters are scary
They’re mean and they’re hairy
I try to avoid them whenever I can
But if I am fast then
I can sneak past them
It’s all a part of my cunning plan

Hiding away again down here in Dungeonville
Hoping my luck doesn’t turn for the worst
Some people claim that there’s a fortune to gain
But I know, I’ve got to find it first

Now there are some fighters
Who like armor brighter
But I like dusty old leather just fine
While the others are fighting
I will be a-lighting
Out through the backdoor with all I can find

Running away again, right out of Dungeonville
Hoping my luck doesn’t turn for the worst
Some people claim that there’s a fortune to gain
They’d be right, ‘cept that I got there first

Another gaming song. The first D&D campaign I was in was run by a fellow with an unfortunate tendency to kill off our characters. My friend Jeff was the first of us to have a character actually survive one of Larry’s dungeons, and this song is about how he did it. (We probably would have tracked him down and expressed our displeasure at being deserted in battle, but, well, we were all dead.)

This song was published in Xenofilkia #74, and in the Gafilk 2004 songbook.

A Con Spent A Circle

In Songs

A Con Spent In A Circle
by Robert Wynne
Music: “Circle” by Harry Chapin
© 1999

(chorus)
A con spent in a circle
All our troubles gone
The music echoes through the night
Till the breaking of the dawn
A con spent in a circle,
Friends sharing harmony,
We’ll give no thought to sleep now —
Come on and filk with me

I met you sometime last year,
I don’t remember where,
But I know we shared a song or two,
Help me circle up these chairs.

I’m glad to see you came again,
we’ve still a lot to do —
The convention day is over,
but the evening is still new.

(chorus)

A voice lilts out a melody
A single strumming hand
A bodhran adds a rhythmic beat
It’s better than a band

When other fans have gone to sleep
We circle up and sing
And each takes home full measure
of all the joy we bring

(chorus)
I wrote this song shortly after the first GaFilk. I remember leaving the hotel on Sunday and commenting to Teri Wachowiak that I had a great time, even though it seemed I spent most of the weekend rearranging chairs into circles. The phrase “A con spent in a circle” wandered through my head, and connected with the Harry Chapin song, and I wrote the lyrics over the next few days.

I’ve been very flattered at the attention this song has gotten. It was published in Xenofilkia #64 and the Gafilk 2001 songbook, and was nominated in 2001 for a Pegasus Award for Best Filk Song.

Catacombs

In Songs

Catacombs
by Bill Sutton and Robert Wynne
Music: “Kodachrome” by Paul Simon
© 1999

When I think back on all the trolls I’ve fought in dungeons
It’s a wonder that I’m alive at all
But my lack of constitution hasn’t hurt me none
I can hide in shadows on the wall

Catacombs
Your tunnels are dark and twisty
Your underground lakes are misty
Makes me think all the world’s so far away
I got the monster’s treasures
I love to take it home with me
[So] mama don’t take my catacombs away.

If you took all the ghouls I slew at second level,
Put ’em all together for one fight,
You know they’d never beat my sweet Holy Avenger –
Everything looks worse to a blackened wight.

(chorus)

Mama don’t take my catacombs away
Mama don’t take my catacombs away

Mama don’t take my catacombs
mama don’t take my catacombs
mama don’t take my catacombs away

Mama don’t take my catacombs
and leave me broke so far from home
mama don’t take my catacombs away

Bill Sutton and I play AD&D every Thursday night at his house in Marietta. This is one of two songs inspired by that campaign.

This song was published in Xenofilkia #74, and in the Gafilk 2000 songbook.

Don’t Panic

In Songs

Don’t Panic
by Robert Wynne and Jeffrey Williams
Music: “Pink Houses” by John Mellencamp
© 1999

Well there’s an ad man in his bathrobe
Living in his dreary world
They built a new bypass right up to his front door
And you know he’s not feeling so good
Then his old friend, down from Guilford
Says “Arthur, there’s no where to hide,
Let’s go have ourselves a couple of drinks at the pub and talk
and then we’ll catch a ride

Come roam the Galaxy along with me
Come roam the Galaxy, its something to see, Arthur
Come roam the Galaxy, be lonely and free
The Guide says Don’t Panic, Arthur, come roam with me!

Well there’s a Vogon, he’s a captain
Writing down his Vogon poetry
He’s got greasy skin, never smiles
And you know — he doesn’t like strangers
So he threw them in the airlock
Said they would never grow old
Kinda cold and lonely floating round in outerspace
But then came the Heart of Gold

(chorus)

There’s a strange man, on Magrathea, building a brand new planet, oh
He signed his name into a giant glacial mass
and he says he made the fjords in Oslo
And there’s robots, and there’s white mice
But they ain’t no big deal
Cause there’s crazy guards baby
And they will shoot, and shoot, and shoot to kill

(chorus)

The creative process is a funny thing. I was driving home from work late one night when John Mellancamp’s “Pink Houses” came on the radio. When I heard the line about the black man with “an interstate running through his front yard”, I thought of poor Arthur Dent in the Hitchhiker’s series, and this song came out. The scansion’s a bit odd in the chorus, but it works the way I do it.

You’ll Never Surf Alone

In Songs

You’ll Never Surf Alone
by Robert Wynne
Music: “You’ll Never Walk Alone” from the musical Carousel
© 1998

When you log on the net hold your head up high
And don’t be afraid of a crash
If your Netscape should fail, it’s no cause to cry
You’ll have it right back up in a flash
Surf on through the lag,
Surf on through the faults
Tho’ your mem’ry be fragged and blown
Surf on, surf on, just restore the defaults
And you’ll never surf alone!
I wrote this for my sister-by-choice, Dina, after she e-mailed me in a panic because her Netscape installation had gotten corrupted and she was afraid she’d lost all her saved bookmarks and e-mail. Just a bit of silliness to cheer her up.

This song was published in the Gafilk 1999 songbook.

Writer’s Lament

In Songs

I haven’t yet begun to write
Deadlines, they come and go
Still I sit with an empty page
I haven’t yet begun

I haven’t yet begun to write
Editors phoning me
They paid advances six months ago
And still i’ve not begun

Writing down stuff that is ridiculous
Ball it up and throw it all away
If I could only get a page or two
Then I’d be well and on my way
Beginning…
Beginning…

Another day gone by and I
Got not one damn thing done
I’ll get up tomorrow and start again
And I’ve yet to begin

There’s a wonderful scene in the musical 1776, between John Adams and Thomas Jefferson. The latter is supposed to be writing the Declaration of Independance, and the former has come around to check on his work. When Jefferson fails to produce the document, Adams sputters “Do you mean to say you haven’t finished?”. Jefferson replies calmly, “No, sir. I mean to say I have not yet begun.”

Boy do I know that feeling!

Still Captain After All These Years

In Songs

Still Captain After All These Years
by Robert Wynne and Jeffrey Williams
Music: “Still Crazy After All These Years” by Paul Simon
© 1998

I met an old classmate down on Starbase Ten
He seemed surprised to see me, but I just smiled
And we talked about our old ships and had ourselves some beers
I’m still Captain after all these years

Now I’m the kind of man who tends to socialize
I have a brand new girlfriend every day
But I will not make comittments that bind me to one sphere
Still Captain after all these years

My prime directive
Tossed out
Defective
I did it all my own way
I never worry
Why should I?
I always save the day

Now I sit by my window and look at the stars
I’ve done far too much damage for just one day
But it always works out for the best despite the Admiralty’s fears
Still Captain after all these years
Admittedly, Kirk spent some time as an Admiral before being busted back to Captain, but it’s obvious that captain is where he belongs.

This song was published in the Gafilk 1999 songbook.

Obligatory Convention Filksong